Rats!

So I didn't get the Bryant Fellowship. But at least I applied this year, which is more than I've done for the past five years! And I'm steaming ahead with my work on Sophocles regardless. Someone's bound to have some money for this biography I'm slowly but surely assembling - if not now, then a little further down the road when there's an outline and some chapters that I can shop around. Putting together the Fellowship application wasn't so much about hoping I'd win it (although of course I did) as it was finally getting my ass in gear with regards to the scholarly half of my writing. I have as many nonfiction books up in my head as I do fiction, and none of them are going to see the light of day unless I get out there and take some chances. Well, I may have crapped out on my first roll of the dice, but just getting to the table and throwing my money down was a victory in and of itself. Now I won't be so afraid to bet from here on in...

Postscript: A silver lining of sorts - today I learned that the reason why I didn't get the Fellowship had to do with my eligibility, not the merits of my proposal (which the committee loved, apparently!). So now I've begun the search for alternate sources of funding. One strong possibility is to shop a possible book to the Harvard University Press, a natural choice of publisher considering the subject matter. Another is to find a charitable or cultural foundation willing to award a fellowship or grant. In any case, I'm eager to continue with my research!